Rides, Rallies and Events Recap

Bike Week Oklahoma 2017 - Sparks, Oklahoma

Written by  July 29, 2017

Every summer bikers come from all directions to get together at Sparks America Campground near the tiny town of Sparks for Oklahoma Bike Week. The dates for this year’s event were June 15 through 25. Bike Week always features live music on stage every night, bike shows and Woody’s auction of chainsaw artworks and furniture on both Saturdays, and lots of bike and people games. There are fun themes for most nights of the rally.

Here’s the schedule for the 2017 event:
Thursday, June 15-Music by Without Warning
Friday, June 16-Viking Night-Music by Trench Monkeys, 10:00 p.m. pole dancing contest paying $1,000 to the winner
Saturday, June 17-Hippie Night, Music by New Dynasty and Blind Date
Sunday, June 18-Karaoke
Monday, June 19-God & Goddess Night, Battle of Bands-Dixie Wrecked, Everfade, Wicked Mischief
Tuesday, June 20-80’s Dance Party Night, Battle of Bands-Gentry Counce, Trench Monkey, Rags in the Rearview
Wednesday, June 21-Battle of Bands-Lifted, Str8tshot, RNG
Thursday, June 22-Women, Dress Your Man in Lingerie Night-Battle of Bands championship round
Friday, June 23-Naughty School Girl Night-Battle of Bands winner followed by Blind Date
Saturday, June 24-Robert Butler Night (rally attendees dress like SparksAmerica owner Robert Butler) - Hollywood Knockouts Oil Wrestling-New Dynasty, Red Sawyer

I headed south on Thursday (the earliest I could get away) to Harrisonville, Missouri, where I met with Doc Lonnie and Melissa who would be contributing photos to our article on the rally. We got to Sparks early enough to set up camp and enjoy the evening activities on the playground. It was a hoot to see male bikers dressed in way-too-revealing lingerie.

The Ultimate Biker Game Challenge was a week-long contest with various games happening Monday through Thursday to narrow the field to two couples. Monday’s events were Roll the Dice and Flush the Turd. Place the Items and Chair Balloon Race were Tuesday’s games. Bowling Game and Sink the Weenie were contested on Wednesday. Slow Drag Golf and Cannon Blast on Thursday concluded the elimination phase of the competition. All of these games were great fun to watch and were crazy enough to defy explanation. Friday morning’s final event was Balance the Pole. The passenger sat on a section of plastic pipe that protruded on both sides of the bike. The object was to use the pipe to knock tennis balls off orange pylons. Rick and Red were the winners of the $1,000 grand prize with Ken and Amanda finishing second.

Friday’s schedule featured even more bike games and people games than usual. People games included Butt Darts, Dizzy Race, Tampon Race, Tire Roll, Newlywed Game, Buff the Woody, Titty Licking, Twinkie Eating, and the famous Titty Slide. Bike games were Plank Ride, Hungry Hippo, Slow Weave, Straw in the Bottle, Ring Toss, Drunk Riding (done sober), Horse Shoe Toss, Blind Man’s Bluff, Drop in the Bucket, Barrel Race, and Quick Start. Some of the games had minor changes to make them more difficult. For example, for the Straw-in-Bottle game the bottles rested on pylons instead of kegs, and there were three instead of two. The passenger pulled a straw from the first, inserted it in the second and also pulled another straw from the same bottle, then inserted that straw in the third bottle. Even with the increased difficulty, these contestants did a great job.

Friday evening’s main activity featured a classroom (the south stage) full of wayward school girls who had been held in detention by mischievous schoolmarm Lori. The students demonstrated the misbehavior that landed them in detention, to the enjoyment of the audience. Live music and more adult contests were featured on stage.

Saturday festivities began with the bike show featuring roughly 40 bikes and trikes. The Best in Show winner was very cool chopper owned by “Doc” Holiday of Salina, Kansas. With a raked-out long springer front end and upswept fishtail exhaust, this bike had a great look. The centerpiece was the 86-inch stroker engine with ’47 knucklehead rocker boxes, panhead jugs, shovelhead bottom end, and evo pistons. Congrats to Doc and the other class winners.  

During the bike show, there was a very special event in support of 22 Kill, an organization working hard to prevent suicides among our military heroes. A moment of silence was observed for fallen riders. Following the Pledge of Allegiance, many of the bikers joined in doing 22 pushups in recognition of the tragic fact that an average of 22 military veterans commit suicide every day. This tribute was followed by another solemn event, a memorial for Larry Wiley, also known as Wile E. Coyote, who was a long-time member of the Sparks family, loved by all who knew him. Our host, Robert Butler, said a few words at a permanent memorial consisting of a stone, a small American flag, and a newly-planted tree.

Saturday’s bike and people games included Singles and Doubles Slow Ride, Men’s and Women’s Keg Toss, Keg Roll, Chase the Rabbit, Potato Race, Weenie Bite, Cherry Bite, Balloon Toss, 100-Yard Dirt Drags, Tire Drags, and “Honey, I’m Home.” The games are a big part of the entertainment at SparksAmerica. Willy has been running the games for several years and had a new assistant, Rusty, to help out with setting up the playground for the various games with some assistance from others. Lori always does a great job with public address duties.

In addition to those for game winners, there were other awards as follows: Hairiest Biker-Doc Lonnie Blum, Longest Hair-Blackhawk-36”, Longest Beard-Slick-19”, Longest Ride to Sparks-Brook-over 650 miles from Manitou Springs, Colorado, Men’s Tattoo-Justin (Koi), and Women’s Tattoo-Angela (Fairy). Plaques for winners were, as always, very nicely done.

Following Woody’s auction, at 6:00 p.m. a large crowd gathered in the vendor area where a 10 x 10 “pit” had been set up for the performance of the Hollywood Knockouts oil wrestling team. The first two of the beautiful performers wrestled each other. Then several of the scantily clad girls wrestled with audience members who were the highest bidders for the opportunity. It got even more messy and slippery when all of the girls, this time covered in hot cream, participated in the Massacre Bout, ganging up on one audience member. Our new friend Doc, the bike show winner, was a ringside manager for one of the bouts and joked that he might change his name from Doc Holiday to Doc Hollywood.

In addition to great music for Saturday evening, there was a contest to see who could best imitate our host Robert Butler. His look always includes overalls with one strap undone. The winner of the contest was a man who, like the others, dressed like Robert, but also imitated his behavior by grabbing the microphone and telling the long version of what could have been a short story. It was an entertaining show, and some girls who wore costume beards filled out their overalls very nicely.

The 2017 version of Oklahoma Bike Week was a blast. Special thanks to our hosts, Robert and Brenda Butler. I’m already looking forward to the next trip to Sparks for the big Biker Halloween Bash. 

Here's a link to the for events and bike show awards.

Stripe

Photojournalist/Account Representative - Kansas City, MO

Dave Baxter, a.k.a. Stripe joined our staff in December, 2003, as a photojournalist. If that road name sounds familiar, you may have seen his photos on the pages of such publications as American Iron, V Twin, VQ, In the Wind, and Easyriders. Stripe attends as many rallies, bike shows, and charity runs as he can and is a major contributor of photos and articles to our magazine. His first assignment was our January, 2004, cover photo, where he snapped the awesome photo of a 1958 Harley-Davidson Duo Glide. A rider since the age of 14, he loves to help and encourage new riders. Stripe enjoys meeting new people and looks forward to catching many of our readers in the viewfinder of his digital camera. Contact Stripe at stripe@cycleconnections.com 

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